I dislike Wal-Mart, but I dislike people who dislike Wal-Mart more.

You heard me, lefties. What are you going to do about it?

You know, if more than half of your comic strip is taken up by an explanation of the joke, you should really rethink your joke-telling skills

OK, I know it must be difficult to find humor in the Mark Foley sex scandal in a way acceptable to the conservative sensibilities of G-rated family newspapers, but I'm feeling kind of grouchy today so I'm just going to nitpick.

• I know it's the setup to the punchline, but it's not just prominent Democrats doing the criticizing
• The Monica Lewinsky affair was between two consenting adults, not a pedophile and minors
• There's a weird emphasis on "still," as if everything should have been settled now and we should move onto more important topics (which, if last week's comics are any indication, include exposing the hypocrisy of fictional liberal strawman characters)
• Now having giving the Foley scandal lip service (hey, I'm up to date on current events! I'm relevant!), he can move back into his comfort zone and make more Clinton jokes (such as today's strip). I eagerly anticipate next week's story arc, in which intrepid reporter Mallard Fillmore exposes that the North Korea situation is somehow entirely the fault of an administration that's been out of office for almost six years
• Speaking of which, Mallard Fillmore must not be a very good reporter if all the news he reports is from 2-3 weeks ago
• Jesus Christ, just look at that caricature, man