FAQ

Here is an FAQ (that's an acronym for "frequently asked questions," for those of you who are as dumb as Livestock) all about Josh "Livestock" Boruff"
Q: why
A: Many religious experts and theological scholars ask themselves this very question in regards to Boruff's continued existence

Q: why does he dress so goofy
A: Little known fact: He is blind

It is unknown whether or not Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka was aware of this when he put him in charge of Photoshop Phriday

Q: countdown until ebaum steals this. Hey you! Put your ad here!
A: Another little known fact: Livestock and Eric Bauman are long-lost brothers who hate each other, somewhat similar to Ann Landers and Dear Abby

Q: Why does he touch himself at night.
A: he is dirty and sinful

Q: did he hvae [sic.] fun playing softball with samadhi and nutmeg and laser soup
A: No as he spent most of his time being afraid of the ball

Q: josh boringthehelloutofSAwithhiswriting-uff
A: Heh, that's pretty clever

*opens envelope*

"What is one thing nobody has ever said in regards to a Livestock article"

hey-oh

Q: why is he the most levelheaded person on the forums
A: his head has one of those balancing rulers with liquid inside them

Q: hes not really the president is he?
A: He is deputy chairman of the Seattle chapter of the National Drag Queens Who Are Also Internet Comedy Writers Association

Q: tell me about his hygiene
A: I would, but he doesn't have any

Q: why is he the funniest, best wow player on the forums.
A: you must have pretty low standards

Q: does josh 'livestock' boruff like lasagne - mhd, age 8
A: No but he likes the nationally syndicated comic strip "Garfield." Everyday he opens up the funny pages and cuts out that particular day's installment of the feisty feline and puts it on his refrigerator. In fifth grade he had a Garfield Trapper Keeper that said "This kitty's got CLAWS!"

Q: how tall is his favorite animal
A: The elusive catapple is roughly 12 feet tall

Q: does he have a girlfriend
A: He has a weekly webcomic in which he showcases the adventures of himself and Princess Peach

Q: how many dogs can he lift
A: 0, he has puny girl arms that can barely lift a ladybug

Q: thank you
A: you're welcome