haha thanks guys
we've got a really good show for you tonight
i know i say that every night but this time i mean it
ok whats in the news today
haha <celebrity> did something
<joke involving trait of celebrity>
listen man i just talked to the network
i got some bad news
somebody's made a huge mistake
I'm going to open up a hipster joint where all you do is come in, sit down, and read that day's installment of "Garfield".
It will be post-modern-ironic, or something.