***ITEM!!!*** Leaked e-mails from the Sony Pictures hack reveal plans for a new movie about the blue alien guy from the Walkman commercials!!!!!!!
Breaking News From The World of Hollywood!!!
Disney Imagineers are working around the clock adding characters and elements from the 1987 Lucasfilm game Maniac Mansion to the venerable Haunted Mansion attraction
"We've got these audio-animatronic tentacles that are so incredibly lifelike," says chief imagineer Tony Baxter. "We just can't wait to introduce them to our guests"
BREAKING NEWS FROM THE WORLD OF HOLLYWOOD!!!
GEORGE LUCAS ADDS JUSTIN BIEBER TO STAR WARS???
"WHEN WILL THE CHANGES STOP???" ASKS PROFESSIONAL NERD SIMON PEG. "THIS IS THE WORST THING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED" LAMENTS MANCHILD KEVIN SMIT. "BOYCOTT THE STAR WAR BLUE RAY" SAYS DARTH_GARF93. J.BIEB UNAVAILABLE FOR COMMENT.
Just got off the phone with an NBC insider who told me how the producers plan to continue The Office once Steve Carell leaves the show. Let me tell you, the writers have cooked up an INGENIOUS plotline that should leave every Office fan satisfied. If you've been worried about a Michael Scott-less Dunder Mifflin, this ought to put your worries to rest.
WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD!
*
**
***
****
***
**
*
*
**
***
****
***
**
*
*
**
***
****
***
**
*
*
**
***
****
***
**
*
*
**
***
****
***
**
*
So, who's replacing Michael Scott?
Michael Scott!!!
In an upcoming episode, Michael decides he doesn't want to be part of the documentary anymore, and requests that the crew digitally pixellate his face and modulate his voice. This will continue for the remainder of the series, thus eschewing the need for writing out Michael or replacing Steve Carell (a production assistant will stand in for Michael's body). You've got to hand it to those clever Office writers for coming up with a seamless way to continue without Carell's involvement! Can't wait to see how it turns out.
Fat & sassy feline Garfield cast as new Spider-Man???
White man steals job from Mexican
***ITEM!!!*** The car from Knight Rider just plowed into a Yoshinoya!!!
***ITEM!!!*** Jay Leno just straight up killed a man!!!
***ITEM!!!*** Crash writer-director Paul Haggis has purchased the TV movie rights to Professor Henry Louis Gate's arrest!!!