THE BEST DEBATE MOMENTS OF THE 2008 PRESIDENTIAL CAMPAIGN
DEMOCRATIC PRIMARY
- Democrats answer a question from a talking snowman
- Joe Biden: “Hey, are you gay in these holes? These foxholes?”
- A nervous, sweaty Bill Richardson thumps his desk repeatedly
- Some debate moderator asks Obama how he can claim to bring change if he has a bunch of former Clinton Administration officials advising him. Hillary cackles and says “I’D LIKE TO SEE HIS EXPLANATION FOR THIS ONE,” to which Obama cooly responds with “I look forward to you advising me as well Hillary”
- Obama becomes animated for the only time ever and yells that Hillary did nothing about workers while sitting on the board of Walmart
- Hillary Clinton freaks out about always getting asked the questions first and starts talking about saturday night live for some reason???
- ABC News’ atrocious questioning, which includes asking Hillary “PEOPLE DON’T LIKE YOU. RESPOND.” and grilling Obama on reverendwrightbillayersflagpinbitterclinggate for 40 minutes
REPUBLICAN PRIMARY
- Mitt Romney announces that he wants to DOUBLE GUANTANAMO. Somehow this is not the most dickish thing he said in the debates
- Ron Paul, in a rare moment of intelligence, says maybe the terrorists attacked us for a reason other than “THEY HATE OUR FREEDOMS.” Rudy Giuliani rebuts by shouting “9/11” repeatedly
- Some fourth-tier Republican candidate whose name I forgot explains his foreign policy: put fictional character Jack Bauer in charge of everything!!
- Fred Thompson interrupts a discussion about healthcare to crack a hilarious gay joke about how Mitt Romney loves mandates
- Mike Huckabee evades a question about the death penalty with a folksy joke about how “Jesus was too smart to run for public office” and gets heaped with praise for his hilarious wit. Months later, Obama evades a question about conception with “it’s above my paygrade” and gets flack for it
- Alluding to Romney’s many flip-flops, McCain says “my, you really are the candidate of change” after Mittens starts talking about how he’s all about The Change
- At some “values voters” debate, questioners demand answers from empty podiums
PRESIDENTIAL/VICE PRESIDENTIAL DEBATES
- Pretty sure there weren’t any memorable moments in the first debate, correct me if I’m wrong
- SAY IT AIN’T JOE THERE YOU GO AGAIN POINTING BACKWARDS AGAIN DOGGONE IT
- Tom Brokaw, Super Moderator: “I’m sorry gentlemen you will have to condense your talking points to less than 30 seconds instead of actually debating the issues”
- “Health” of the mother
- “Zero?!?”
- Life imitates the little-seen movie “Swing Vote” as McCain and Obama spend a substantial amount of the third debate talking directly to Joe the Plumber through the TV screen
