August 25, 2011

jack

is the bin laden bot ready

chloe

dude quit asking, there’s like 20 wires I have to put into this thing

jack

hang on getting another call

jeff

Hi Jack. It’s your estranged half-brother Jeff.

jack

hello jeff

jeff

Listen, I intercepted some of your conversations. I know you’re building a robot implanted with bin Laden’s brain so you can defeat it and be the big hero again. Please, I urge you to reconsider.

jack

it;s not fair you got 2 be the one to shoot osama

jack

that was supposed to be my kill!!! i called dibs back in 01

jeff

It’s just how things turned out, what happened happened. Reanimating a dead terrorist mastermind so you can get back at me isn’t the right answer. You must channel your anger and jealousy into a more constructive outlet.

jeff

As it so happens, I’m organizing a little project that I could use your help with. A little freelance work, if you will. You can’t see it but I’m winking right now.

jack

(also winking) i read u loud + clear

jack

whos the target? gadaffi? kim jong-il? pelosi?

jeff

Our brother Edward. He is a disgrace to the Bauer name and must be destroyed. Will you join me?

jack

i was so wrapped up in my hatred of you that i completely forgot how much i hate eddie!!!

jack

im all in bro.

jeff

I’m glad to hear that, Jack. I’ll get my fratricide gear. We’ll be in touch.

jack

bye!!!!! ttyl

chloe

jack I finished the robot but it went rogue and smashed through ctu and killed a bunch of people!!! now it’s heading for the 405!!! you gotta get down there asap!!!

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